Our 1st Donation

Tonight we received our 1st donation toward our adoption fund! Thank you Olivia Wilson! Olivia is making bracelets and selling them to raise funds for adoptive parents at Frazer. That now makes 2 teen aged girls at church who are stepping out and actually putting their talents to work to help make a difference for orphans. It is awesome to see our youth put their faith into action!

This is an example of the bracelets Olivia's making.

Toni Doss is selling tie-dyed items to raise money for adoptive parents.

She has started an organization called "For the Least of These". 

In adition, Toni is going to send everyone who donates to

The Holliday Family Adoption Fund

one of her car decals.

Thank you girls for all you're doing for us and the other adoptive parents at Frazer! 

Witness to a miracle

If you don't already follow the Martin's blog, please check it out. Its http://www.cheaperbythehlfdozens.blogspot.com/. They have witnessed a miracle in their newly adopted son, Joshua's life. Even the doctors can't explain this except as miraculous.

And then there were six

Don't panic. We're not talking about getting six all at one time, but in the future it may end up being six in all. We found out last week that Sasha and Anton's dad still has primary custody of them. The authorities are in the process of terminatig his parental rights, but we don't know how long this process will take. Then after his rights are teminated, they will have to spend a year on the waiting list in Ukraine before they're elgible for international adoption. The lawyer says this process could be as long as 1-2 years or more. We're not ready to close the door on adopting Sasha and Anton and we're going to wait it out. We are hoping to be able to see them and talk to them when we go to Ukraine. We want them to know that we're willing to wait for them, but if a Ukrainian family wants to adopt them during that one year waiting period, we would support whatever decision they make. Ultimately we want them to be happy and in a permanent family. Whether God plans for that to be with us or with another family, we'll have to wait and see. So we are laying this at the feet of Jesus and we will be patient and wait to see what comes, but I would be dishonest if I didn't admit that I'm hoping His plan lies with us.

Artem, his sister, & his brother

The lawyer asked us to please consider and pray about Artem and his two younger siblings. They are clear and ready to be adopted. He sent us this picture yesterday of the three of them and we were instantly in love. We don't even know their names yet! They are 9, 10, & 11. We think the route God is leading us in right now is to adopt Oleg, Artem, and his two siblings. That will give us 3 girls and 3 boys!

This can happen very quickly (in the world of interntional adoption). Once we get the home study completed and submitted to the proper authorities in Ukraine, we're talking about being in Ukraine in 3-4 months after! That means we really have to get the ball rolling on fund raising. First thing is completing the home study. That cost $1500. If we can find 100 people to donate $15 each, we'll have it covered. Once the home study is completed, we will then qualify to start applying for grants. Please be praying for us and if you feel so led, make a donation of just $15 toward our home study cost.

Thanks to everyone who is helping us on this journey!

 Holliday Family Adoption Fund

3132 Fitzgerald Rd

Montgomery, AL 36106

This process is so hard!

We got word from the lawyer in Ukraine today. Oleg is a definite go! Not as good of news on the other three. Sasha and Anton's father still holds custody over them. He doesn't care for them, so they're in the process of terminating his rights, but I'm not sure how long that takes. I've emailed the lawyer asking for a time frame. Maybe if the authorities know a family wants them it will speed up the process. Artem can not be adopted without his two younger siblings. He has a brother-10 and a sister-9. Four is a stretch for us, we know we can't take on six.

Please pray that God leads us to the children He wants us to have. If its meant for us to have Sasha and Anton, then let the termination of their father's rights happen quickly. Its not fair for their father to force them to live in an orphanage while there is a family out here wanting them. If God closes the door to adopting Sasha and Anton, please pray He prepares our hearts for Artem and his siblings if that is His will.

We did get good news too (other than Oleg can definitely be adopted). The process goes very fast. Once we get our home study completed and all the information to the lawyer, we're looking at 3-4 months till we're in Ukraine getting the boys!-Or boy, or boys & girl, whatever it ends up being.

That brings up another issue - Fundraising. If there's anyone out there that's been through this and has some advice on how to get this ball rolling, please feel free to contact me!

billsgirlkim@gmail.com

Already prayers are being answered.

I woke this morning around 3am. I tried going back to sleep, but finally around 3:30 I got up. There are so many things to do and so much going through my mind. I decided to check Facebook. Its around noon in Ukraine and I thought I'd see if any of the boys were on. To my surprise, I found a message from a friend offering us bunk beds. She had no idea that we were planning on putting bunk beds in the boys' room! I'm just amazed how specifically this need was met. We have had so many kind words, offers of support, and affirmation from friends and even from people we hardly know over this last week. I'm just amazed and humbled at the way our Christian community is gathering around us. I know this is what will give us the strength to make it through this.

Thank you Cheri for such a wonderful surprise this morning!

Reality

The reality of what we're about to undertake has really started hitting home over the last week. Don't get me wrong, we love these boys and we're willing to do whatever it takes to get them home with us. The thing is, Satan keeps bringing  people around us that have so many questions. There's nothing innately wrong with having questions, but when you keep hearing the same questions over and over, you start to have doubts. "How will you afford this?", "How do you expect to feed four extra people?", "Have you really considered how this will effect your daughters?" You start to have doubts that God can really do this. You start asking yourself, "Do you really believe that this is what God has planned for you?" or "Who are we to think that God will just make this happen?" As I've pondered on this today I thought about a quote from The Truth Project. It all boils down to this simple question,"Do you really believe that what you believe is really real?" When I search my heart, the answer I get is, YES! I believe that we had no intention of adopting 4 adolescent boys when we agreed to be house parents at BridgeStone for a weekend. I believe God has been preparing our hearts for adoption for several years now. I believe these boys were put in our path for a reason and that reason was to fall in love with them. I believe God wants us to give these orphans a home.

I started thinking about some of the great stories from the bible today; Noah and the flood, Joshua and the wall at Jericho, David and Galiath, and far more I can't recall at this moment. What do all these stories have in common? God calls them all to do something they're totally unequipped to do on their own. When you have no means to accomplish something on your own power, but it still gets accomplished then you truly see that God made it happen. Some of you may not know this, but Bill was laid off from his job in January. We had to use our savings to make it through those tough months and accept help from friends and family. Bill did finally find a job in July, but the point is-we do not have the financial means to make this happen on our own. If, or should I say when, the funds are raised to carry out this adoption, we will all know without any doubt that God made it happen.

So, I don't know how we'll afford this and I don't know how we'll afford to feed 4 growing boys, and I don't know if my daughters truly understand what it will be like to have 4 boys living under their roof. But what I DO know is, that my God is an awesome God and if He has led us to take this on then He will make it happen. He will whisper in the ear of someone at church to make a donation. He will move in the heart of someone like Toni Doss, who at the age of 16 has already set up her own organization to raise funds for adoptions. He will make sure someone who owns a business fills a need we have for an item without us ever knowing how they found out about it. And most of all, I know my daughters will see faith in action. They will love and be loved by 4 brothers. They will know that they CAN change the world with God's love.

I have prayed for a long time for a way to witness to my dad. I hope through this journey, he sees something miraculous happen. Something that can only have happened through Gods faithfulness and provision.

Surprise Bill! You're going to have 4 sons!

Friday
September 9, 2011 (cont'd)

I thought I'd better text Bill & tell him I urgently needed to speak with him. I texted him to find a place and call me. He did and I went through the whole story, how we could talk to the boys today about adoption & how I had to do it without him with me. I told him I had talked to Oleg, Sasha, Anton, and Artem and that all had said yes but Artem, he needed time to think about it. Bill was surprised, excited, and almost speechless, but mostly he was just plain happy. Oh how I wish he'd been there with me, to see the boys faces, the huge smiles.

Ends up the van has one more stop to make, the ATM. Hope and Hayden have decided they're going to ride with them to the airport. There's not enough room for me and I don't think I want to drive that far. Also, I'm just so happy I can't wipe the grin off my face and I'm not sure I could handle the goodbye at the airport. Best to leave it like it is now, they're happy and I'm happy. We follow the van to the bank so I can get the girls some money to take with them. After getting some cash we walk over to the van. I'm hugging the boys who are hanging out the back doors and then I'm called to come around to the side. As I walk up to the side of the van, I'm met by a smiling Artem. Yes, he says. Really! Are you sure? Yes, he says again. We hug and celebrate. Ok, got to call Bill back and let him know its for sure now, we're adopting all 4!

They all load up in the van, including my 2 girls, and head to Atlanta and I go on home. I'm out in the back yard taking the dogs out when I hear someone pull up in the driveway. Its a van! I run to the back door and sure enough its the BridgeStone van. They have come by to surprise me and let the boys see our house. They meet the dogs & cats, they see the pool & are very excited, and then they want to see where there rooms will be. I'm mortified b/c we've been up at BridgeStone most of the week, so the house is a mess. The boys don't seem to mind though. They have to hurry and get back on the road, but before they go we get a good picture of us in front of the house.

As they pull away from the house I'm thinking, "Wow! In a few months I'll have 6 kids!"

Yes you heard me right, we want all 4.

Friday
September 9, 2011

Eric and Wendy were a quite surprised and very excited. These were 4 wonderful boys, but for some reason, up until this point, no one had stepped forward to adopt them. Its b/c they were meant for us.

Alright, we've got to find a way to talk to the boys before they're gone. Next stop is the eye doctor, we'll talk there. Again I follow the van in my car. When we stop my palms are sweaty and I can't quit smiling. How do I do this? What do I say? Bill's not with me. Is this what he wants too? There's no time and he can't answer his cell phone at work. I have to do it now or lose the moment forever. I ask Katya to get Darkleg and Artem out of the van so we can talk. Sasha and Anton go into the doctor's office.

This is not the greatest place for this conversation, but we find a suitable, shady spot next to the building and lead the boys over. The girls and I stand facing the 1st two boys. We tell Katya to tell them that we love them and we want them to be a part of our family. She begins speaking in Russian and before she can get it all out, Oleg is saying "yes, yes, yes, definitely." Artem has a very distressed look on his face. He begins speaking to Katya. We're holding our breath waiting. She tells us he says he has a younger brother and sister, can he still be adopted? We explain to him that they may have to ask their permission. I tell him that we will understand if he doesn't want to leave his brother and sister. We do not want to pressure him, we just want him to know he is wanted. I tell him to think about it, this is a very big decision. He speaks again to Katya. What he says breaks my heart. He asks, "Why did you choose me?" I tell him b/c he is so dang cute and his dimples stole my heart from the very 1st day. This makes him smile and he says he wants to think about it on the way to the airport. We all hug and there are no words to express the feeling.

Sasha and Anton come out of the doctor's office and we call them over to our now special spot on the side of the building. Oleg and Artem have returned to the van, so its just us, Katya, Sasha, and Anton. I ask Katya to tell them that we've fallen in love with them over the past week and we want to know if they'd like to be part of our family. She begins speaking to them in Russian and slowly I see the biggest smiles I've ever seen cover Sasha and Anton's faces. Sasha says yes 1st and then Anton says yes too! We hug, we cry happy tears, and begin telling them about our home, our dogs, our cats, etc... It is one of the happiest moments I've had so far in my life.

I have to follow the van to one more stop to drop off some luggage into someone else's car that will be going to Atlanta. While they're unloading my car, Eric comes over and says he has something to tell me and it will probably make me cry. He says after all the boys were back in the van Anton told him on that morning he had prayed for the 1st time to God. He prayed that God would get him out of the orphanage. I couldn't believe it. I knew then, without a doubt, this is what we were meant to do.  

But what does He want?

Wednesday - Friday
September 7-9, 2011

I stayed home Wednesday and had myself a pity party. The boys were going to Birmingham today & I didn't want to drive that far and I think I just needed a day away to get myself together. We had decided to go back on Thursday and do our final goodbyes. The girls and I would go as soon as Hayden got out of school and Bill would come up when he got off work. A lot of the families that had also been house parents came and we had a big dinner together. After dinner we went back to Centerpoint. We hung out with the boys and readied ourselves to say goodbye. They are leaving the next day for Atlanta to fly back to Ukraine. Bill and I went into Oleg's room with Katya (the interpreter). We told him we love him and we will miss him. He said he loves us too. We cry and share some very long hugs, then its time to go. We are saying the rest of our goodbyes when Darkleg steps outside onto the porch. He is crying and didn 't want the other boys to see him. Bill went out to talk with him. He was begging to go home with us, said we could hide him in the trunk of our car. Bill lost it, so I lost it too. We just cried with him and held him. Bill couldn't come back the next day b/c he had to work, but the girls and I assured Oleg we'd be back tomorrow to see him.

We finally got us all together and went to the car. On the ride home, Hayden began to share with us about her evening. She had spent most of the night with Artem. They played video games and "talked" as well as they could. Hayden said Artem cried when we were getting ready to leave. Could he be having a change a heart? Could he be considering adoption? Could he be thinking he might like to be in our family?

The boys are due to leave around 1:00 for the airport. Hope ended up staying at BridgeStone last night with Eric and his family. Hayden and I get up and start getting ready. We want to get to Centerpoint around 11 so we'll have some time to spend with the boys before they leave. Hope calls me as we're getting ready to leave and says they've moved up the time, they're leaving at 12. They have to take Sasha by the eye doctor to get his glasses adjusted before heading to Atlanta. She also says that the rules changed and something about talking with Katya and the boys. I don't quite understand what she's talking about. I think she's talking about the new rule they made Tuesday night about not talking to the boys about adoption. Hayden and I hurry and head to Centerpoint.

When we get there, the boys are finishing up their bible study. When its over they begin giving out gifts. Anton gives me a gift, a coffee mug that's just precious. Is Anton changing his heart as well? Is his gift saying he's considering adoption now?

We start loading the boys up in the van and I follow in my car to the gas station so they can fill up. Hope starts telling me again that we need Katya to talk to the boys. I ask her what she means and she says I told you earlier, you can talk to the boys now about adoption. OH! I didn't understand what she was telling me earlier. The rule had changed from Tuesday, we could talk to the boys now! Who? Had Bill and I really decided which boys we wanted to adopt? We had said Sasha, but only if Anton would agree too. We knew Darkleg, but if we took him what about Artem? How do you choose who you take and who is left in the orphanage? In that moment it hit me - I have been going about this all wrong. All this time I've been thinking which one do we want, which one would fit into our family. Not once had I asked "But what does He want?" Its funny when you get that moment of total clarity, when you realize its all been right there in front of you the whole time, all you had to do is ask Him. I rushed into the gas station. I needed to talk to Eric and Wendy. Is it true, we can talk to the boys? Yes it is. Do you know which one you want to talk to? I opened my mouth and I let God lead me. Sasha and Anton....and Oleg....and Artem.
  

Heartbreak :(

Tuesday
September 6, 2011

It takes about 30-40 mins. to drive up to BridgeStone from our house, so we had a good while to talk about how we felt as a family regarding adoption. The girls kept saying: I love Oleg, I think we should adopt him; I love Artem, I think we should adopt him; I love Sasha, we should adopt him; I love Anton... We finally had to tell them that we're not looking at adopting puppies here, these are people & we can't adopt all of them. Its not easy to explain to children why we can't just have them all. So we stated discussing who we loved and felt like would fit into our family well. I said lets see if we can all just agree on one & then we'll go from there. Oleg, my sweet boy with the ear infection, we all love him & know he would fit into our family well. Ok, we definitely agree on one. Now, anyone else? Sasha, we all love Sasha. He is so bright & kind & we really would like him to be part of or family. But then there's Anton, Sasha's brother, we love him too. The only problem is he doesn't want to be adopted. Sasha & Anton still see their father sometimes & Anton is not ready to sever that relationship. What do you do? Adopt one without the other? I don't think we can do that, but Sasha says he wants to be adopted, even if his brother isn't. We will definitely have to talk about this tonight at the meeting. Ok, anyone else? The other Oleg (or Darkleg as we called him b/c he has tan skin). We love him too & from the moment we arrived at BridgeStone he and Bill had a special connection. Without him saying a word, we all know where BIll stands on Darkleg. Alright, is that everyone? Artem. We all love Artem, but he also is resistant to the idea of being adopted. He hasn't really bonded with Bill & I, but he is forming a connection with the girls - especially Hayden. Ok, we'll ask about Artem at the meeting too.

We drop the girls off at Centerpoint to hang out with the boys while we go to the meeting. Its all about the paperwork, home studies, passports, etc... We talk for an hour or so & then the orphanage director wants to say something. Normally a lawyer from Ukraine comes with the group and he gives you info about the child/children you're interested in and then if they're clear to be adopted. If everything checks out and they are clear for adoption you get to ask them if they want to be part of your family. Well, the lawyer didn't get to come this trip b/c he was completing several adoptions in Ukraine. The orphanage director explains (through an interpreter) that she will answer question about the boys, but she doesn't want us bringing up adoption with the boys. If we are interested in a child/children, she will ask on your behalf when they return home. She feels it will be less stressful on the boys. It was like being asked to step out of the room while your own child is being born.

Finally the meeting is over and its time to go sit privately with the orphanage director and ask about the boys we're interested in. We're about to bust we're so excited! We sit down and through an interpreter we begin to ask about Oleg, my sweet boy with the ear infection. She says a lot in Russian. She keeps looking at us apologetically. We're on the edge of our seats waiting to hear what the interpreter says. Its not good news, he's not available for adoption. I feel like I'm going to melt into my chair and the room is spinning. How can this be? How could God let me love him so and then say we can't have him. I am absolutely heart broken. He wasn't my only love at BridgeStone, but he was my 1st. He was the one that opened my eyes, taught me I could love a child that wasn't a baby. He showed me that it was possible to totally love a child you didn't carry within your own body.

Bill took over a lot of the rest of the meeting. I tried to listen well b/c there were still other children we loved and may need homes. But do I really want to know? What if all the ones we've become attached to are also not available for some reason? What about Sasha? She says yes, he is a fine boy and he wants to be adopted. What about his brother, Anton? She thinks he still doesn't want to be adopted. What did she think we should do, separate them? She can't give us that answer. We know this is something we'll have to pray about. What about Darkleg? Yes, he's also a fine boy, but he is not "intellectual'. What does that mean? Does he have a learning disability? No, she doesn't think so, just a little slower than the others. She worries it may be harder for him to learn English. What about Artem? The last time she spoke to him, he still didn't think he wanted to be adopted. WOW, can this woman tell us anything good? We leave the meeting in a daze. We had talked all the way there about who we wanted, which ones we loved, and who would fit into our family. This wasn't supposed to turn out like this.

It was hard leaving that night. Lots of tears and hugs. I felt numb.

Our Story - How in the world did we get here?

Labor Day Weekend

Bill & I have discussed fostering and/or adopting children for over 5 years. And when I say children, I mean babies, we never saw ourselves adopting older children. We love children & always hoped to have a large family. We felt that God was moving us to enlarge our family through adoption. When we moved into our "forever" home 2 years ago we began the process of becoming foster parents for Catholic Social Svcs. We chose them b/c they only deal with babies. They only place newborns, you foster them for 2 weeks until they're placed with their adoptive parents and their adoption waiting list was short. In our minds, this was perfect for us. We could have babies coming in that we could spoil before handing them over to adoptive parents & with the list being short we would eventually get to keep one of these babies as our own. Well, its been 2 years & we have not fostered not even one baby. Ever since we've been fostering for Cath. Soc. Svcs., they've had a dry spell.

Our church, Frazer UMC, started a new program this year called OneFamily. This is a ministry to orphans & widows. I attended the orientation & told Bill all about the opportunities there would be for fostering. We began discussing changing from our current fostering situation to fostering through DHR. Everyone we talked to @ church who fostered through DHR had children placed right away. We felt like there were all these children out there & we were ready to give them a home with love & faith. We still wanted little children though, none over 2 yrs old. I called & spoke with Shepherd's Staff (the church's liaison with DHR) & told them what we were interested in doing. We were given the name & # of a person to contact @ DHR, but I never called. Things kept coming up: we needed to get a baby bed, the kids were sick, I was sick, we went out of town, & on & on. Something was keeping me from contacting DHR, I just didn't realize @ the time that it was God & He had a much bigger plan in store for us.

Through an e-mail from OneFamily we heard about a group of 9 orphans from Ukraine coming for a month long stay @ BridgeStone in Verbena. We looked @ all the opportunities available to volunteer & thought it would be cool to be "house parents" for a weekend. One of our closest friends & their family were doing it & they got us in touch with the director @ BridgeStone - Eric. Eric & I began emailing one another & I was sad to find out that there were no more weekends dates available to be house parents. School had started back by this point & there was no way we could do it on weekdays. We decided we'd just find another way to volunteer. Our daughters soon got the chance to participate with one of the Frazer Sunday school classes hosting the boys. They spent a whole afternoon with them & came home telling us the names of the ones they really felt connections with. Oleg likes to tickle you, Vlad pinches you on your side, this one laughed alot....

We were sad when we found out that our friends Matt & Danielle were having to cancel their weekend with the boys b/c Danielle was going out of town to visit a sick relative. We were also excited though b/c that meant we'd get to take their place. We arrived on the Friday evening of Labor Day weekend. We had no idea what we were doing, so we were really nervous. I finally got to meet Eric that I'd been emailing with for the last couple of weeks. We sat with him & his wife, Wendy, during dinner & they filled us in on what we'd be doing while there. They asked us if we had any plans for adopting. We told them we did, but we were really interested in much younger children.

I immediately went into mom mode & with my OCD self I started cleaning up around Centerpoint, the home that the boys stay in while here. Bill & the girls took most of the boys to the pool while I cleaned. After I finished, me & a couple of the boys who didn't go swim hung out & played wii. The boys came back from the pool & they began to devour snacks & were wild! Eric says it always gets a little crazy on nights they get new house parents. We got in bed late, but had to rise early & start breakfast. We had about 15 people to feed! Saturday was pretty laid back with no engagements for the boys to attend. They had a bible study time with Eric after breakfast & then Bill & the girls were taking them to play paintball. I'm still in mom mode, straightening up and trying to stay on top of the "home" stuff. That night, things began to change drastically for me. One of the boys had an ear infection, probably swimmer's ear from all the swimming they'd been doing. He didn't feel well. I took his temp & he had a fever. I gave him Tylenol, put drops in his ear, & tucked him in to bed. He was so appreciative of the care I was showing, nothing really special just what I'd do if it were my own child that were sick. He just smiled @ me and told me "sank you" in his best English & then it happened - I was in love.

Sunday was a very busy day. The boys had to attend a church svc @ 11 in Prattville, lunch to follow hosted by one of the Sunday school classes @ the church, meet a couple @ Target in Montgomery @ 2 to buy the boys new blue jeans, & then to a pool party in Autaugaville by 4:30. It actually went very smoothly & we pulled up to the party in Autaugaville exactly @ 4:30. I continued to spend time with my sweet boy with the ear infection, but this evening was the 1st time I wasn't cooking or cleaning & I really got to start getting to know all the boys. This was supposed to be our last night, but we were going to be so late getting back & Monday was a holiday, so we decided to stay another night.

Monday was another laid back day - Thank Goodness! It was a rainy day, so we just hung out with the boys, playing wii, & doing crafts. I rode with Eric to take my sweet boy with the ear infection to the ER. The fever was continuing & it was becoming obvious that the drops alone weren't working. When we got back, I gave him his meds & tucked him into bed. How was I ever going to leave this sweet boy? How was I going to leave any of these boys? How in the world can you fall absolutely in love with kids in just 3 days? I was beginning to dread 6pm, the time our shift would be over. I could tell Bill was feeling the same way & our daughters too. We stayed for dinner & then began our goodbyes. I think I did very well, just a little teary, but Bill's heart was totally breaking. He said it was one of the hardest things he'd ever done in his life - telling these boys goodbye.

There was an adoption information meeting on Tuesday night, so we thought we'd go & just get some information....but in our hearts I think we already knew we were doing more than just getting information.